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Inga varför

Author: Mikael Holewa

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I en liten tvårummare i Traneberg, dit mina föräldrar, Hans och Alice flyttar 1938, ska de leva i mer än ett halvt sekel. Efter sina första år på Kungsholmen börjar mina föräldrar så småningom bygga ett nytt liv i Sverige efter att ha lämnat Wien och Österrike under nazitiden. Mamma och pappa undslipper med nöd och näppe den oerhörda tragik som ska följa i andra världskrigets Europa.

1942 föds min storebror. Samma år som min farbror utan framgång söker uppehållstillstånd. Samma år som svensk polis hittar och skickar honom från Traneberg till Tysklandsfärjan i Trelleborg för vidare transport till koncentrationslägret. Samma år som mina föräldrar förgäves försöker få ut min mormor från Treblinka. 1950 föds jag. Kriget är slut och folkhemmet börjar byggas i Sverige, liksom vårt eget.

Inga varför är de ord jag förknippar med mina föräldrars olust att förklara, deras ovilja att gräva i allt som varit och deras rädsla för att inte allt ska bli bra. Min mammas ständiga försök att hålla skenet uppe. Inget får misslyckas. När något riskerar att falla utanför ramarna tystas det ner. Allt döljs effektivt av både mamma och pappa. Verkligheten förskönas.

Så lever två människor som älskar varandra tätt ihop i över sextio år. De bygger sin egen och sina pojkars framtid utan att bjuda in till frågor om ursprung eller vad livet gjort med dem. De ser bara framåt och önskar inget hellre än att glömma, att det förflutna aldrig kommer på tal.

Inga varför speglar min bild av mina föräldrar, så olika och ändå så samspelta. Inget att diskutera, sa min pappa. Någon som vill ha kaffe, sa min mamma. Så undviks alla farligheter, så hanteras det svåra. Mina bilutflykter med pappa glömmer jag inte. Att han leker med mina egna barn, inte heller. Att mammas Topfenknödel och Kaiserschmarrn fortfarande vattnar sig i munnen går inte att ta miste på. Deras innerliga önskan att deras pojkar ska må bra finns alltid i rummet.


Mikael Holewa

Mikael Holewa, född 1950 i Bromma. Pensionerad lärare och skolledare. Bor i Haninge söder om Stockholm, gift och pappa till fyra barn, farfar och morfar till nio.


Pages: 70



Price example, 1 copy
Hardcover Premium, cover and interior in full colour - 132$ (2nd book 66$)

Hardcover Basic, black/white interior - 33$
Soft cover Premium, cover and interior in full colour - 105$ (2nd book 52$)

Soft cover Basic, black/white interior - 21$
Spiral bound, cover and interior in full colour - 95$ (2nd book 47$)


½ price off! If you order more than 1 copy of the same book or photo book, you will get the following books in the same order for half the price! (NOTE: doesn't apply to BASIC where the extra rebate already is included)



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